I propose a new element of suspense: in this, the story of my life...

Where did the big spider go?

Yup. Went to take a picture and man, Big Guy, you should come back because its not that I’m scared of you but, I just like to know where you are, you know?

For the most part, today was a lot of reconciling with the issues regarding item #10 of the last post.

[Pause. Here, I pause to let you go and check back at the list.]

Well I did also cut through my middle finger, as nearly the first thing on today’s agenda was “Toast Bagel.”

Then I guess that makes the second thing, “Eat Jalepeño Bagel.”
And this is the part where, if you know me, you are making the EEEK face.
Yeah, I made the EEEK face when I stuck it in my mouth. I thought the bit of red on the bagel was just a drop of blood. Ha ha. It was actually some sort of chili pepper, out to ruin my morning!

But it didn’t because I love to be crafty. Let me explain.

I currently have zero Band- Aids, (Between having zero of a lot of other things, Band- Aids somehow did not make top priority? Adulthood is about mistakes I think.), and when I cut my finger it started to bleed as though I were supposed to have already thought of building an ark full of animals to save our world. Well, instead of an ark…
I crafted this finger cast with Neosporin, toilet paper, and green masking tape.
I wasn’t sure if it would be a good idea to post a picture of it because while although I am so very proud of its crafty construction, a picture of my middle finger might limit the viewing of this page to an adult audience only.

I figured I would kill two birds with one stone and get the repulsive tie- die blanket in there as I try and make this picture bearable for all age groups.












Meanwhile, I started knitting again. I think of my sister and the way she would delicately word my choice in yarn colors.
“Barf green” or “puke yellow,” or… try on, “poop brown” for size.
Not to be mistaken with, “ a warm, soft pallet of autumn foliage”

I discovered that two houses to the left across the street from me (eh?) there is a perfectly wonderful swing set playground for two, padded with wood chips and everything! I took the yarn and the giant headphones my dad got me, which double as earmuffs, along with my FM personal radio and listened to NPR until the reception static convinced me to change to classical. And then the 6-year-old girl made me change to the bench because, as she put it, “Yer hawgginnn the sweeeeengggguhh” (translation: “this is my territory woman! Hop off the playground before my kinder- crew comes to mess you up!”)
















Ooohh. Lots of dialogue in today’s post. And italics. I welcome italics. Some even call me the Italic Stallion.

I think tomorrow I will make Daal in honor of it being Thursday.



Shoot! I was supposed to go square dancing today!


*Note on the bagel situation: I tried putting jelly on it to smooth out the spice. I think the word that best describes that concoction is cement.

As an element of suspense I propose that my next post include a picture of the giant spider outside of my window!

Man, Coco Rosie's lyrics are messed up but I pretty much binged on them all day.

Today was a heavy day. Its so heavy, in fact, that I don't know how else to summarize it without a (boring/maybe melodramatic) litany of sorts.

10.Got news of a death, felt crappy
9.Passive aggressive bus driver on the #6.
8.Talked to the Head Dude of the Ooligan Press, felt sure about getting the MA
7.Sat in on the Intro to Book Publishing class and learned the difference between three choices of hyphen- style typographical marks : hyphen, 1/n, and 1/m
6.Got an interview for Thursday at Moonstruck Chocolate Cafe where... I lied and told them I LOVE to eat CHOCOLATE
5. Read about meditation and listened to Norman Blake (Whiskey Before Breakfast) on the yellow line home
4. Showered for the first time in 3 days, ate tomato soup and raisins
3.Got news of a birth, felt comforted
2. Read Heartbreak Soup, listened to Alan Watts, and nearly cried about birth/death
1. Hung out with the kids across the street and felt like a real, live human

Did I ever tell you my sister dressed in my clothes for nerd day at her high school? I am actually mildly flattered.

I haven't drawn pictures in 4 days. I'm not feeling like myself ... but then Jeff might say, "When are you not yourself?"

I miss Inchie Pinchie Ponchie.
Pinchie is a donkey.

I´m tie- dead.

I finished the bed sheet and good thing I was too lazy to put it out last night to dry in this morning's sunshine because this morning's sunshine was actually this morning's rainstorm.

Well its out there now and its actually quite ugly. I'm pretty sure it got kind of wet from the afternoon drizzle (which I may or may not be making up but, I think it happened while I was at the library- either that or someone sprinkled my bike seat with tiny drops of liquid).

At the library today I got another Hernandez brothers comic even though I still haven´t finished Love and Rockets. Also, I got a few CD´s. So far I've listened to Frank Zappa's Them or Us and Antibalas´ Security. Both were suitable for afternoon lunch- making (free bagel with some jam and things).

I got this Fritz Lang DVD collection of some sort. I know my brother likes him so I might as well try it out. I have a feeling I will be going back to my addiction to movies. I´m calling it an addiction because I use it in the same way most alcoholics use alcohol: a repetative solution for sadness or loneliness; the latter in my case. Yeah so, last night I watched Il Posto ("A magical tale about a young man's initiation into adulthood"... just like me!) and it really made me miss my friend Daniel in Austin. He has introduced me to so many weird movies but meanwhile he's got good taste in movies in general. The only reason I would say that is because I like the same movies he likes and so I guess the principle here is basically if someone likes the same thing as me... then they have good taste?

Welllll... today when I got home from another trip to the grocery store ( I have to get a little bit at a time since I'm on le bike) I was thinking on the ride home, "Man, I would love to have a tall glass of ______"
... then realizing I can't have a tall glass of anything rather since I have no tall glasses.

On that subject, I am also learning a lot about the consequences of being frugal. The other afternoon I was debating the choice of two candles. Both candles were of the same scent but one was pricier than the other and I, of course, decided on the one marginally cheaper. Then I came home to find out the candle would burn for only 2- 4 hours. I was dissapointed to notice at the grocery store today that my abandoned option was presumptuously sitting on its shelf with a label declaring a "lasting 6- 8 hours".

or maybe I should be a more attentive consumer? The thing is...
I really already am! I am that snobbish shopper standing in the middle of the isle for 6 minutes...reading the label on DelMonte´s Mandarin Orange Slices cans wondering ... why do they have to add sugar?!

Anyway. I applied to a million and one jobs online today. One was for a chocolate cafe... in hopes that I don't have to prove my devotion to the product. But seriously, in this economic crisis, maybe I have no choice but to abandon the founding values of my core existance. Am I exaggerating or is this not what patriotic Americans had to do in the time of the Great Depression?


Today the only people I talked to were:
The teenage cashier at the checkout "Oh, I don't need a bag actually......"
The library checkout woman "You too" (response to Have a nice day not, I love you)
And a dog on the street "Pssssttt..."

Well tomorrow I will apply for more jobs and go to a pumpkin carving event at an acquaintance's house. This is strangley in congruence with the latest activity formula in my life.
Where a = life
a = craft project + productive project

Try and see past the consequent behavior of my minimal social interaction.

There are people my age who live across the street. I am too timid to go over there and innitiate some kind of mumbling garbage about where I came from and what they do for a living. Oh and, what a nice cat you have.

I feel slightly defeated by the ants in my kitchen.

Here is a picture of my curtain fabric:

Life in Stump Town

Woke up this morning with the worst stomach ache and I´m so glad that's over now. I have been getting migraines lately, too. Why?


I just finished the twisting/folding/rubber- banding process of tie-dying a large piece of fabric I have been using as my bed sheet. It took a long time but I made some mate this morning and if there's one thing I learned about being alone... you drink all the mate for yourself...

I got the fabric and many others at this awesome store, SCRAP. And then yesterday I was supposed to go to Tryon farm to learn some goat things and permaculture things and what have you... but then we missed the bus and instead I bought a shower head from the rebuilding center, orange lentils from the Ethiopian market, a temporary bike from the Community Cycling Center, and one of those typical Mexican style woven blankets from a hippie shop down Alberta. In that shop there was a border collie and I knew it was a border collie but I asked the deadhead shop owner anyways because the dog was so fat I couldn´t believe my eyes. And then he said his name was Kodak (I heard Kodak, Wes heard Kodah) and he said to the dog "Tell her all about it" wherein the dog proceeded to talk to me.
But in dog-talk.

Then I bought a plant at Pistil´s nursery where I sat for a half hour and talked to Tim, the mushroom man, about starting to grow fungi inside my home. He was eager to tell me all about the details and we agreed that being a beginner in this whole deal is a really intimidating thing.
He explained in a funny way something about the process where you might pick a certain mushroom from the ground and say to yourself "This is the little guy that I like and basically, I want to clone him because he is just right for me. You see, then you know he's a good one because he is living and therefore has the right makeup for survival, so you realllyyy want to make more of him, right?"
And I´m trying not to laugh because there are these really hilarious hairy chickens walking around and Wes came behind me and whispered "That one looks like he has an Afro and little bell- bottoms on". But then
Tim talked about pressing the cap on a sterile sheet of paper with a cup on top to prevent contamination . That's a process that lasts over night and after you see the gill prints you would, the next day, soak the paper in water and take a sterile syringe and suck up that water....

So all in all there is so much room for contamination. Like even when you´ve got it going in your mason jar, the part where you cut a hole and then hot glue the hole but have to stick the syringe in the whole where the glue is (after its cooled but before the glue has hardened)... that part seems tedious, too.

So, for confidence Tim recommends I by a Blue Oyster starter kit. Which, I will.

After I tie-dye this blanket- which has for the most part been a sound track of like the electronic music Jason sent me (I love Badun's album cover!) instead of the typical like I don´t know ... Donavon and Phish- I am going to go to the New Seasons and get some white wine vinegar and make rose petal vinegar with cloves. And I´m going to get a potato so I can start a potato vine in my kitchen, which will only be my second plant so far =(

Maybe my oyster mushrooms will soon count as like 45.

Its pretty cold in here. I can put the heat up but then I feel spoiled. Well, you see I´m not paying for utilities for October... but my land lady is so nice I wouldn´t like to run up her bill. But a side note: My oven doesn't work!!!!!!!!!

Recently Wes and his friend Paul took me to Sacred Harp shape notes singing at the Albina Press down the street. It was an incredible experience. I´ll leave it to the YouTube video explain.


Here´s a funny story:
Whenever my home owner´s dog does a poo poo in the wrong place instead of violently reprimanding the dog she goes up to the poo poo and tells it about how bad it is.
"You are such a baaaaaddd poo poo. Boy what a bad poo poo."
And then Essie, the dog, does that cute head turn and her ears flop around in confusion and she is seriously attentively staring at the poopoo and I just know that she is thinking "Jeez what a bad poo poo that one was."

The bike I got is a yellow shwinn. Its stupid but it will hold over until I get the road bike I have my eyes on at City Bikes in southeast. That one is nice but pricey. And anyway I can hold on to this yellow one for when people come visit (or couch surfers) because its really just silly to visit Portland with out a bike.

I went to a bacon party last night. (I know) I mean it was gross but all in all it made me feel great to know I was the only one not feeling disgusted from eating a massive amount of bacon at the end of the night. And then this one vegan kid showed up with vegan oatmeal cookies from this bakery and I felt like I was being given a gift for being mindful of what I put in my body. Later, the vegan kid got tricked into drinking bacon whiskey! I met some pretty cool people at that party; a married couple who will take me on their next mushroom hunt. Also, I got to go out and fetch the egg from the chicken coop they have built in the back yard. That was a largely hilarious experience.

Wes is gross because he made bacon brownies. But there were bacon chocolate cupcakes there, too. That is the epitome of my arch nemesis in the food world.

Well, I am still working on getting some pictures of the place. So far this is all I can offer:


I still need: a bathroom mat because my shower door refuses to let me fix it, a lamp, rain pants (a recommendation from everyone in Portland), friends, a coffee maker/percalator, a record player, shelving or a pole or a closet to put my clothes, a job, a solid internet source, a cat?, etc.
I might be able to get a job at New Seasons. Their minimum wage is like $10 and they have health benefits. And yeah, its a grocery store!

Meanwhile, here is my favorite new You Tube find:

(why do YouTube users leave such inappropriate comments)